Worship False Idols

Words by -  Christopher Stenton

Alright, straight off the Don Bradman this new PM stuff is all so crazy. Was it just me, or did I read, like four months ago that K-Rudd was the most popular Prime Minister that this country had seen in the past 50 Years? Did Mr Popularity honestly just get bumped mid-term, a forced eviction from the Lodge mid-lease, or am I just chewing on the mushrooms growing out the back again? How can this be?

We all know that JG is a female, flat living, ginga ninja, child-less, hair-dresser-dating, ball of political hotness right now, but c’mon, are we really that fickle, that quick to turn on those we love? Hell, instead of ‘swing voters’, we’ve now all turned into ‘hardcore trance voters’ ready to change our vote a beat per minute.

I tell you what though, these love / hate politics are seriously getting to be like Australian Idol. You know, one week being hotter than wasabi and the next, on the scrap heap like Shannon Noll’s facial hair. Hey! Maybe I’m truly onto something here. Imagine voting polls where, we could not only sms our electoral vote instead of lining up at a primary school or church for half a day, but we could have a different Prime Minister every few months! And they would have to bring it (dance) for our votes! Not only would this keep our Prime Minister totally fresh, but with give them a level of street cred that would rumble political foundations across the globe.
Imagine Stephen Smith demanding respect by cracking some crumping moves in the middle of foreign trade talks, or even Nicola Roxon getting hers off with some crazy-arsed disco punk while laying down the law on health policy; and don’t get me started on the melt-down this country would experience if Wilson Tuckey just happened to bust out the robot instead of talking his usual crazy-old-man shit. Bring it on I say.

But we’d better hurry and get our game on, as judging by this it seems that the Americans are already seeing the value of elections based upon real talent.:

 
Personally, I think we’re already on track to get a taste of this action here in Australia; I mean, how else could you possibly explain Peter Garrett outlasting both K-Rudd and Peter Costello, than by taking a quick peek at these past dance-offs.  Check out 1:05 here 

and 1:52 on this one -

I still maintain Peter Garrett is still on the Front Bench because the guy can move, hands down; no one is even close to bringing that crazy drunken praying mantis stylee like him.

Just a couple of seconds spent watching the Rudd-Meister dance not only has me cringing and reaching for my mobile to vote his ass off, but provides a full and succinct  understanding as to why he is no longer in charge. In all fairness to the little guy however, we shouldn’t forget how strongly he represented and rolled into power on the back of some nice work putting John Howard to shame, as shown in the vid below, leaving us to scratch our heads as to how and why we let such a talentless spook lead us for over eleven years:

The lines are open Australia, so get voting! It’s up to you to decide who is the next winner of Prime Minister Idol!